I found
myself trying to make somebody feel better about my situation after having to
put my cat down, and I actually ended up making myself feel better.
We were
on the subject of pets, how hard it is to lose them, and how much we love and
get attached to them being part of our lives. In my friends upset after hearing
the story of me putting my 15 year old cat down at the vets, I said something
that felt profound, but at the same time—obvious.
Animals
don’t know how to love a little. They don’t know how to be conditional with
their affection, and frankly, they don’t even have the concept of needing to be
forgiving. Their love is so genuine, so pure, all they know is to give and
receive it.
This is
why it’s so hard to say good bye to a pet we are attached to. Any attachment,
whether it’s 7 months, or 15 years, has happened because you and an animal made
a connection and started loving one another.
Not all pets
seem to be interested in having a connection and a real loving relationship. I
have a cat like that too, but most animals bond to us, and we to them. The
reason we find it so easy to love them is possibly because they don’t have the
human qualities that mean we get into arguments, struggles, or uncomfortable situations,
so what a pets relationship is built on is “I love you, you love me, and I
appreciate you feeding me.” Not only is it simple, but the simplicity allows
the love to be pretty huge.
My Super
loving cat “Phish” was with me for all 15 years of his life. He was a kitten
when I took him into my arms saying “No, no, no, we can’t have a pet, it’s a
commitment, but man he’s cute.” He and I became buddies immediately, playing
all the time, and teaching him all the do’s and don’ts of living in a house
with me. My husband at the time joked “I
can’t believe how that cat will do anything you tell him.” To which I replied
by telling the cat to do something, and he did. Phish and me had a connection,
we had that mutual love thing going on, and it was cool.
It will
be a week tomorrow since I put him down, but I still have a painful lump in my throat as I think about him. In this week without him, I’m
realizing I need to put more thought toward all the hours of love Phish
invested in me. I shouldn’t be concentrating on his old age and how possibly
uncomfortable his body was getting over time. That was a fraction compared to
all his years of genuine love and obvious happiness.
Animals
have a skill we don’t, maybe it’s more evolved, and maybe it’s less, but what I
do know is the love is encompassing. They don’t get bogged down by all the
other emotions out there: anger, jealousy, sadness, fear, and the like. It only
takes a second to look them in the face, and stroke their body before they
begin to exude a love exchange.
Phish was amazing at being a cat, and even better at showing me pure love.
Phish was amazing at being a cat, and even better at showing me pure love.