Ho Jo Mojo

Last night I sat with a friend of mine in a local fast food Mexican restaurant chatting over French fries covered in guacamole, fresh refried beans, and pico de gallo. (a favorite dish I’m pretty sure they only make when I come in asking for it.)

It was late, we probably shouldn't have been eating, but I find that food with a friend in a booth is the yummiest food around. (So few foods taste their best when eaten alone.)

This friend and I have known one another for about 24 years, so when we get together, it’s not uncommon for us to be laughing one minute, crying the next, and all the while ‘putting the world to right’… which would be far more accurate to say, ‘putting ourselves to right’. This friend and I share the desire for growth and both know that the most growing happens by facing the painful aspects of ourselves in life.

In this vein, we had just finished the laughing and crying when she suddenly got all excited, and said…. “You need to hear this song! I know you know it, but it’s so old, we've forgotten all about it, and it’s SUCH an awesome song. Listen to the lyrics!”
She got on her phone, pulled it up, and set the phone face down on a stack of napkins so the speaker faced upward from the center of the table. Howard Jones started playing.

No one is to blame.

“You can look at the menu but you just can't eat

You can feel the cushions but you can't have a seat

You can dip your foot in the pool but you can't have a swim

You can feel the punishment but you can't commit the sin

And you want her and she wants you

We want everyone

And you want her and she wants you

No one, no one, no one ever is to blame

You can build a mansion but you just can't live in it

You're the fastest runner but you're not allowed to win

Some break the rules and live to count the cost

The insecurity is the thing that won't get lost

And you want her and she wants you

We want everyone

And you want her and she wants you

No one, no one, no one ever is to blame

You can see the summit but you can't reach it

It's the last piece of the puzzle but you just can't make it fit

Doctor says you're cured but you still feel the pain

Aspirations in the clouds but your hopes go down the drain

And you want her and she wants you”

She then turned to me and said, “I’m always looking for someone to blame for my pain, as if that would make it somehow better, or less, or ok. And you know what? No one is to blame! My pain is my pain, and blaming anyone doesn't get me anywhere that helps.”

She and I have been discussing a book I lent her called “A New Earth”, and since the ideas in this book have been in her attention lately, she has been noticing many aspects of our ego’s are all about blame and reasons, instead of acceptance and “I don’t mind”.

We both agree “I don’t mind” is very difficult, but we also both agree that finding that space would be so much easier to live in.

After my filling meal with her, I came home and ended up on the phone with another lovely friend. When I brought up Ho Jo, we got in a discussion about how his lyrics were all very open minded and we began googling numerous Ho Jo songs.

I feel tempted to say Howard Jones was ahead of his time, but I really only have my perspective to say that… He was ahead of MY time, and all these years later, with the song lyrics long since memorized, I’m actually listening to the words, and realizing, his songs need to be listened to again.

New Song

"I’ve been waiting for so long

To come here now and sing this song

Don’t be fooled by what you see

Don’t be fooled by what you hear

This is a song to all of my friends

They take the challenge to their heart

Challenging preconceived ideas

Saying goodbye to long standing fears

Don’t crack up, bend your, brain see both sides

Throw off your mental chains

Don’t crack up, bend your, brain see both sides

Throw off your mental chains

I don’t wanna be hip and cool

I don’t wanna play by the rules

Not under the thumb of the cynical few

Or laden down by the doom crew

Don’t crack up, bend your brain, see both sides

Throw off your mental chains

Don’t crack up, bend your brain, see both sides

Throw off your mental chains

I've been waiting for so long

To come here now and sing this song

Don’t be fooled by what you see

Don’t be fooled by what you hear

This is a song to all of my friends

They take the challenge to their heart

Challenging preconceived ideas

Saying goodbye to long standing fears

Don’t crack up, bend your brain, see both sides

Throw off your mental chains"